As I drift through the days the way we all do, I look for ways to inspire others. I live to help others find happiness and peace. I used to think it was my jog to make others happy but after many years of thinking that way and feeling I had failed somehow, I came to understand that other people’s happiness is not up to me, it’s up to them.
We are all responsible for the way we think and the happiness we choose. Sometimes life throws us curve balls and interferes with our best thought plans and we feel depressed or angry and out of control. That’s because we are out of control. I’ve heard and read many times that man may plan his course but God plans his steps. (Prov. 16:9) If you don’t think so, just look at plans you made that didn’t work out and think of how in the end, many of those changes were for the better.
We can set intentions and make plans and follow through as closely as we possibly can but if they don’t work out they way you expected, don’t be angry; instead, see with an open mind and look for the good that can come of the new circumstance. There is a reason for everything and you can accept that better when you believe that there are other ways to get to your destination.
Inspiration for others comes in many shapes, sizes, intentions and emotions. Be open to what can be, be aware of what is and be thankful for what never was. Everything will be as it should be. Everything changes in the blink of an eye. Be calm, be love, be open and be true.
Shoes! We either love shoes or hate them or if you’re like me, your feelings about shoes fall somewhere between love and hate.
Sure, I love a nice pair of shoes but I have learned that in
my shoes, comfort comes first. I learned long ago, while working in the salon,
the importance of a good pair of comfortable shoes. If your shoes aren’t
comfortable and balanced well for your body and foot type, you can end up with
sore legs, back and feet and possible long-term leg, back and foot issues.
When was the last time you were actually fitted by a shoe salesperson instead of on your own quick pick at the local shoe store or sports shop? Yes, there are still educated shoe and foot people available to help you find your perfect fit for your personal style and there are so many options out there. Even if you don’t purchase anything the first time, at least you’ll have a better idea of what is good for you personally.
Treat yourself to a good pair of shoes or sneakers, your feet, legs and back will thank you!
“Failure is only achieved when you don’t try. Success is the result of every small step you take toward leaving worn out behaviors behind.”Dawn Silva – Initiate Wellness
Anxiety hits every one of us from time to time. There are
many levels of anxiety and many causes of it. Anxiety or anxiousness can be
happy and caused by excitement to do something, go somewhere, to meet someone
and a number of other good things we look forward to. Other anxieties can be
negatively caused by PTSD, the environment, illness, confrontation, stress
about school, work, money, relationships, trauma, loss, side effects of
medications or other substances and more. Whichever your anxiety, it’s a good
idea to learn to handle it and/or get professional help.
Sometimes, you can make yourself physically sick if you’re overly-anxious. This is caused by your body releasing stress hormones. Different parts of the body release different hormones which help the organs to run efficiently and in stressful situations, those organs become ‘stressed’ causing us to feel stomach aches, diarrhea, headache, fatigue…etc.
Positive anxiousness is easier to manage and likely will
come to an end soon; such as when you arrive to your destination, meet that
person and any other happy moments that bring that anxious twinge of
When negative anxiety hits you and you feel out of control,
it’s important to take steps to relieve it especially before the sick-feeling
symptoms begin. Steps to try before anxiety hits hard include:
- Slow down, breathe deeply and take inventory of
what is real and what is just negative thoughts or negative self-talk. Remind
yourself that XXX hasn’t actually happened and it might not even happen. This
is a way of dealing with what is real and what is or isn’t possible; it’s
better to deal with what is real that very moment.
- Another way to calm anxious feelings is to
determine if the issue is in your control or out of your control; if it’s out
of your control, follow the steps in the first scenario described above. If it
is in your control, take a deep breath in and exhale slowly then decide what
your next step will be and then the second step after that until the issue is
resolved. Remember, don’t hold tightly to what you cannot control, trust the
- Take a time-out session, meditate, just sit
quietly letting your thoughts come and go without overthinking them, listen to
soothing music, drink warm tea, go for a walk – short or long walks help a lot!
Any form of exercise helps release stress.
- Surround yourself with positive and happy
people, laugh often, talk with a friend (even if it’s not about what is
- Journal it – writing your thoughts, worries,
wishes and feelings helps to release them privately
- Try to have a positive attitude. Learn to ‘let
go’ of negative thinking.
- Eat healthy! The foods you choose to eat help
your body run either efficiently or sluggish and ill. Choose whole, natural
foods rather than pre-packaged, processed, sugary, salty, chemically treated
(for shelf-life) foods.
- Work with a therapist, counselor or coach
depending on your level of anxiety and your personal needs.
Anxiety doesn’t have to be a way of life for you. You can
learn how to adopt healthy behaviors and habits to let go of negative anxieties
and to handle them in the future. Anxiety is normal from time to time but it
should not be a regular visitor in your daily life. Now, take a deep breath
in….let it go.
“Failure is only achieved when you don’t try. Success is the result of every small step you take toward leaving your worn out behaviors behind.”Dawn Silva-Initiate Wellness
Plan for tomorrow but don’t lose today. Learn from yesterday but don’t lose today. We are so often caught up in our schedules that we forget to breathe in and be in today. If your days are full of have to be there or have to do this and you feel frazzled by things that happened or even didn’t happen yesterday, you miss what is happening right now.
Past experiences can hurt us but they also teach us. If you’re continuously on a slow simmer about what did happen or what might happen, you don’t see what is happening. If someone caused you harm in the past, it doesn’t affect them if you’re holding on to anger, fear, hurt and self-doubt; it only affects you, today – don’t miss out on your life.
At the same token, don’t be so busy planning or dreaming about tomorrow that you miss what is today because one day you’ll look back and find that so many years have passed in a whoosh. I talk to so many folks who don’t take a moment to just breathe and be in today. I realize that it is the norm for this day and age of hurry up. For many, myself included, we expect immediate gratification and if we don’t get it, we feel irritated, depressed, hurt or angry.
Make it a point, a plan, to step back each day and decompress. Take time to be in the moment and feel what the day has brought you. Take a moment to reach out to a friend or relative that you haven’t talked to instead of waiting for them to call you – you might make their day. Take time to appreciate what is instead of filling the moment with what was or what might be. Be here now, for yourself, for a friend, for a relative.
Breathe in the very moment. Exhale the anxiety and stress.
If you would like to have your very own personal coach to guide you away from habits you wish to swap for new and good habits, reach out to me and let’s get started!Initiate Wellness
When was the last time you tried something new? I’m not talking about a new food or new movie or even a new diet or exercise routine. When was the last time you did something that you have always wanted to do? What is something you’d love to try but you just keep putting it off for when the time is right? Yeah, me neither.
While you go through the motions of doing what needs to be done, doing what’s expected of you and meeting everyone else’s needs, your needs and desires are pushed further and further into the pockets of time. The thing is, the time is now; now is what you have.
Think of something you have wanted to do that isn’t related to a particular diet or way of eating nor be it related to exercising ‘xyz’ days a week. Remember that one or two things you thought about so long ago, or maybe not so long ago, that you have been saying when I’m done what I have to do daily right now, I want to try this other thing out? Write it down! Make it your goal. Decide on a date and time you want to have it done by and focus your effort and daily doings on reaching that destination one day at a time. Maybe it will take a week, a month, a year or several years to be in a place that you have completely reached that dream thing; that’s perfectly okay, as long as you’re working toward something for yourself.
Life is never guaranteed from day-to-day and it never waits until you’re ready so be ready now. Be the person who can say, “I did it, I wanted to do this for so long and I did”.
I agree that it’s not easy for many of us to think of ourselves but it is an important part of growth, self-nurturing and stress relief. As I often say, self-care is not selfish. When you meet your personal goals, you can help others with a much more grateful heart and mind and a freer sense of being there for others.
Start today, think about your next big goal, write it down, find a photo of it and always keep it in the front of your mind – at the top of your pocketful of wishes.
Sometimes I find myself wishing the week(s) away just to get to the good part of my life. By doing this, I’m in fact wishing my life away; and if I do that, there will be no so-called good part.
Every week brings some sort of discomfort for every one of us. We think about an appointment, or a meeting, a conference, inventory or evaluation at work, a family thing, a delivery, a chore of some kind, whatever your thing to do is; the list is endless and we look forward to it being over and done with.
When we wish for the dreaded parts to be over and wait for the good stuff, we are robbing ourselves of time, joy and being in the moment from our lives. What if the good part is now? What if we are missing out on the good stuff because our focus is on the dreaded chores of life itself?
It’s up to us individually to determine what needs our energy and attention. It’s up to us to set guidelines and boundaries for ourselves and how others treat us. It’s up to me, and you, to make the good stuff happen now. Life is unpredictable and for too many, life is short.
Take time to reflect on how you use your time. Take time to notice how you treat each day, each week and each difficult circumstance and try to turn it into a good experience, a positive life lesson.
Don’t wish time away to get to the good stuff; good stuff on earth is not promised and the good stuff could be happening right now; it’s all in how you view it.
Be positive, be happy and be free from dread.
Energy flows where attention goes comes from the book “The Secret” and when I read that it made complete sense to me. I watch and listen to people everywhere and I see how this statement is true. Where you put your focus is where you feed your desire or your problem; so, after reading that I decided to make changes within myself which I will share with you.
A few years ago, I moved away from a place I was familiar with and where all my friends are. I didn’t move far but just far enough that it’s not convenient to just pop in on each other or run to the store for a quick something. I learned who my true friends are and those who don’t care whether I exist or not. At first, their actions hurt a lot but I have realized that it’s a choice they have made for one reason or another and I accept them for that. At first, I beat myself up for moving here and not closer to the ocean as I planned for many years – I moved here to make someone else happy instead of for myself; lesson learned. Since reading that quote “Energy Flows Where Attention Goes” I decided that it’s true and that focusing on where I would rather be and what I would rather be doing isn’t changing where I am and what I am currently doing. I recently decided to embrace where I am and what I am doing and since then, just one month so far, I have enjoyed more of life than I can remember enjoying for a very long time.
If life has got you down, if people have let you down, and if you are wishing for things to be different then put your focus on what you have right now. Put your energy into where you are at this moment and keep planning for where you’re headed. I’m not suggesting abandoning your dreams, I refuse to abandon mine, I’m only suggesting to accept what is, appreciate what you do have and enjoy this very moment. As you move forward you will find that you are closer to where you want to be, you feel happier and more at peace with each moment and every good blessing in your life.
We cannot change what was but we can accept where we are now and have a little more control of where we want to go and how it will be when we get there. Put your energy to positive use; let your attention flow where you want your energy to go.
Need help getting there? Need help reaching your biggest or even your smallest goals? Contact me at Dawn.InitiateWellness@gmail.com As a certified health coach, I can guide you and help you become in control of your diet and in control of your life!